Locking Horns

This morning I received an advertisement for a DVD series called Betrayed: The Clergy Killer's DNA. I did view the trailer. I doubt I will purchase the series. I was reminder of the book written by G. Lloyd Rediger in 1997 entitled, Clergy Killers: Guidance for Pastors and Congregations under Attack. Stories abound in ministerial circles of how just a few people in a congregation can raise such a fuss the pastoral relationship comes to an involuntary termination, or enough time is bought for the pastor to relocate.

The smaller the congregation the more power can be exercised by a very small group of disgruntled members. Sometimes all it takes is one buck elder, or matriarch, to bring a pastor to their knees not in prayer but crushed beneath the scathing attacks and vicious rumors. Of course, the church bullies cloak the accusations behind the invisible “They.” “They said….” They don’t like….” “They’ll leave if….” When pressed for the names of the “they,” the response is most often, “Well, I can’t say ‘they’ told me in confidence.”

At times the clash between the pastor and the buck elder (male or female) can be so loud and frightening others of the flock to run for cover seeking safety in their silence and in their absence. The irresistible force meets the immovable object. Many a young pastor has been warned, “Don’t lock horns with Elder Jones.” In numerous cases, Elder Jones has far more experience in taking on and taking down pastors than the pastor will have had in dealing with Elder Jones.

A few years ago, the US Army used the recruiting slogan “Be an Army of One.” Even the best trained and armed Ranger or Navy Seal knows they are not “an Army of One.” So too, in the face of adversity a pastor cannot effectively deal with the “clergy killers” single handedly. In one of the family systems courses I had, the advice was “mobilize the bystanders.” Who are the bystanders? They are the other elders and leaders of the congregation, who may be afraid to standup to Elder Jones alone, but might find courage together. They may be members with untapped influence. They are the ones who say to you privately, “I am sorry Elder Jones is causing so much trouble for you.” Mobilizing the bystanders means building them up and encouraging them to speak up when they see Elder Jones behaving badly. It is one thing for the pastor to call out Elder Jones, and quite something else for a fellow member to name the bad behavior. Ultimately, following Matthew 18:15-17, naming the behavior publicly.

In some ecclesiastical systems the pastor can call for help from the presbytery, synod, conference or district. It is a political reality, however, that even for them the pastor ultimately is the easiest changeable factor in the equation. I know of only one situation, after three or four involuntary terminations of pastors, in a relativity short span of time, that the presbytery said, “Enough,” and closed a small congregation.

“Clergy Killers” live on because the system allows them to. Very few “clergy killers” really do not like ministers. They are more often motivated by needs for power and control. They fear losing their power, control, and influence within the congregation to the new and inexperienced minister. The more the pastor resists the buck elder the more Elder Jones has to prove he/she is the one in charge.

So what is one to do when faced with a clergy killer? First, do not engage in the battle. Second, if you must engage do not do it alone. Third, follow the advice of Scripture. Romans 12:14, 19-21

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. … Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord. But if your enemy is hungry feed them and if they are thirsty, give them a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals on their head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Cultural Shift

What are some of the things you notice when you travel, even in your own country? For convenience and safety there are some things which are standardized. Highway signs are pretty universal. The malls and shopping centers are fairly standardized, a few of the store names are different. The big chain grocery stores are the ones which will frequently have different names: Kroger, Publix, Giant Eagle, Piggly Wiggly and so forth. There are many dialects even to the same language. It is not difficult to tell the difference in the spoken language between a person reared in Connecticut and a person from Mississippi. Except for chain restaurants, the taste of food can be significantly different. The local cuisine has a distinctiveness across the country.

Customs of the local populace are often different. Driving can be confusing and sometimes dangerous if you do not know the local patterns. Roundabouts in Boston can perplex a person whose driving has only been in the open spaces of Texas. In some places, when the traffic signals changes from green to red, the facing drivers give way to the remaining vehicle seeking to make a cross traffic turn. In other places one dare not try to make that turn because the facing traffic already will be moving forward in anticipation of the light change.

When I was in college my minor was in speech and drama. The college was small and did not have all the latest sets, props, lighting and sound equipment. We has to make our own set flats, from framing, covering with fabric, sizing with glue, base coating and then decorating. We built our own rheostat lighting board. Our coach, Bob Franks, knew many of us would be going to serve as teachers in smaller poorer school systems. He said, “If you had everything of the latest equipment here, you would be lost when you go where they have nothing. If you learn to improvise and make your own here, and go someplace where they have everything you will do fine.”

If one has been a long time member of a larger church the shock of moving to a radically smaller one can be overwhelming. Many you go to seminary are from mid-size to large congregations, but are often called to serve much smaller congregations. They may be used to a situation where program development and implementation was the primary expectation. In many smaller congregations they have neither the person nor the financial resources to support an unending string of programs. What they want most is a pastor who will love and care for them.

As a general presbyter, I used to say to new pastors coming into the presbytery, “Welcome to the mission field. If you were to go to serve in any other country would you expect things there to be the same as they were at home? Unless you are native born and reared in this particular culture of western Pennsylvania, do not expect things here to be the same as where you are coming from.” Even within the local cultural context each congregation will have its own culture and ways of doing things. Unless pastors take the time to learn the local ways, the pastorate can come to a premature screeching crash.

This is another example of where a coach can be of significant help to the minister. The coach can help the pastor reflect on and adapt to the new culture in which they are serving. Every time a minister relocates there is a new local and congregational culture to learn. The coach can be a valuable to the pastor as a guide through a new terrain in a distant land. Every time a minister relocates they enter the new congregation needing to learn the ways of the local inhabitants. A coach can facilitate the cultural adaptations necessary for a fruitful pastorate.

https://www.wayostccs.com

Learning the Local Culture

What are some of the things you notice when you travel, even in your own country? For convenience and safety there are some things which are standardized. Highway signs are pretty universal. The malls and shopping centers are fairly standardized, a few of the store names are different. The big chain grocery stores are the ones which will frequently have different names: Kroger, Publix, Giant Eagle, Piggly Wiggly and so forth. There are many dialects even to the same language. It is not difficult to tell the difference in the spoken language between a person reared in Connecticut and a person from Mississippi. Except for chain restaurants, the taste of food can be significantly different. The local cuisine has a distinctiveness across the country.

Customs of the local populace are often different. Driving can be confusing and sometimes dangerous if you do not know the local patterns. Roundabouts in Boston can perplex a person whose driving has only been in the open spaces of Texas. In some places, when the traffic signals changes from green to red, the facing drivers give way to the remaining vehicle seeking to make a cross traffic turn. In other places one dare not try to make that turn because the facing traffic already will be moving forward in anticipation of the light change.

When I was in college my minor was in speech and drama. The college was small and did not have all the latest sets, props, lighting and sound equipment. We has to make our own set flats, from framing, covering with fabric, sizing with glue, base coating and then decorating. We built our own rheostat lighting board. Our coach, Bob Franks, knew many of us would be going to serve as teachers in smaller poorer school systems. He said, “If you had everything of the latest equipment here, you would be lost when you go where they have nothing. If you learn to improvise and make your own here, and go someplace where they have everything you will do fine.”

If one has been a long time member of a larger church the shock of moving to a radically smaller one can be overwhelming. Many you go to seminary are from mid-size to large congregations, but are often called to serve much smaller congregations. They may be used to a situation where program development and implementation was the primary expectation. In many smaller congregations they have neither the person nor the financial resources to support an unending string of programs. What they want most is a pastor who will love and care for them.

As a general presbyter, I used to say to new pastors coming into the presbytery, “Welcome to the mission field. If you were to go to serve in any other country would you expect things there to be the same as they were at home? Unless you are native born and reared in this particular culture of western Pennsylvania, do not expect things here to be the same as where you are coming from.” Even within the local cultural context each congregation will have its own culture and ways of doing things. Unless pastors take the time to learn the local ways, the pastorate can come to a premature screeching crash.

This is another example of where a coach can be of significant help to the minister. The coach can help the pastor reflect on and adapt to the new culture in which they are serving. Every time a minister relocates there is a new local and congregational culture to learn. The coach can be a valuable to the pastor as a guide through a new terrain in a distant land. Every time a minister relocates they enter the new congregation needing to learn the ways of the local inhabitants. A coach can facilitate the cultural adaptations necessary for a fruitful pastorate.

https://www.wayostccs.com

The Lone Ranger

“Hi Ho, Silver, Away!” That shout and the William Tell Overture marked the beginning of one of my favorite TV shows, as a kid. Yes, it was The Lone Ranger! While the masked man, always in white, trusty Colts holstered to both thighs, and the famed silver bullets sought to right wrongs he never really was alone. The original dynamic duo of Clayton Moore and Jay Silverheals (The Lone Ranger and his faithful companion Tonto) seldom did anything alone.

I do not know how many times I have heard and have given the advice to pastors, “Don’t be a lone ranger.” For some reason most of us seem to fall into the trap of believing, “If it is to be, it is up to me.” I admit, I have fallen into that trap on more than one occasion. Having served on presbytery committees on ministry (the tradition bodies responsible for the care and oversight of ministers and congregations) and serving as primary staff for that committee of many years, my observation is ministers are prone to act like lone rangers. In part, I think that is because we are not taught how to truly work with the elders on the session.

We come from seminary with a shiny new sheriffs badge pinned to our robe thinking it is now our job to “call the shots,” because “there’s a new sheriff in town.” Some continue with that attitude throughout their ministerial service. Working with the Session is an art to be developed. Too often pastors tend to see, at least some elders, as advisories rather than allies in leading congregations in greater faithfulness as disciples of Jesus.

William Arruda makes a case for “Why You Need to Hire a Coach in 2015” in an article published in Forbes. http://www.forbes.com/sites/williamarruda/2014/12/09/why-you-need-to-hire-a-coach-in-2015/. I highly commend the article to the reading of all who are serving as a pastor whether newly sworn in or of long tenure. Arruda states, When it comes to building your personal brand, a coach can be a powerful resource who can help you get out of your own way, stand out, and take action to achieve the things that are truly important to you. For us as ministers, we can substitute “pastoral style” for “brand” in Arruda’s quote.

If leaders in business and industry are realizing the value of coaching, why has the Church not realized it also? Some presbyteries and synods are offering groups for new pastors. Only a few are providing for pastors, especially the newly ordained, to have a coach. If we counsel ministers not to be lone rangers, why do we use the sink or swim test in the first years of pastoral service without a swim coach?

I think it would have been very interesting to sit in on the campfire conversations between the Lone Ranger and Tonto (just as it would have been interesting to hear the nightly gathering of Jesus and the Twelve). My guess is that is where they mutually developed strategies to deal with the problems and bad guys they would be facing. I can hear them holding each other accountable for what and how things went. A coach is the pastor’s trail companion as Tonto was for the Lone Ranger.

Presbyteries and congregations can strengthen the pastor’s service by making sure the pastor has a coach. I have maintained the belief pastoral tenure can be lengthened by having a coach. It is not good for pastor or congregation to have a “new sheriff in town” every three to five years. In the long run, it is less costly for a congregation, presbytery or synod to invest in providing a coach for new pastors than to constantly be in the pastoral search process.

https://www.wayostccs.com

A Modern Tale

The disciples are gathered behind locked doors. Not only are they afraid, confused and feeling abandoned, they are belly-aching about Jesus’ poor choices. He didn't have to die. He had other options. He was even teased about being rescued by heavenly hosts. They complained that they’d left their businesses and families, not what the hell were they going to do?

Without warning, Jesus stands inside the door, in the room with them. Many thoughts go through their minds. “Oh, crap did he hear what I said?” “Is he going to call us foolish little ones, again?” “How’d he do that? The door was locked, wasn't it?” “Levi must have forgotten to lock the door when he came back from the restroom?” “Maybe it is like on one of those soap operas and a character thought dead, two years ago, suddenly shows up again.” “Is that really you, or some Jesus impersonator?”

Jesus smiles and says, “I guess you all are wondering why I called this meeting. Get another cup of coffee and have a seat. We have some serious strategy planning to do if we are going to pull this company out of the vortex of the great white porcelain. Who now has the treasury since Judas jumped off the cliff or hung himself? The news accounts aren't clear. Did anyone gather his blood money? That will come in handy during the transition. You will remember, we already worked out a succession plan. I’m sorry James and John, but you were too eager to move to the head of the table. I have already designated Peter as the successor. By the way, Peter, you need to watch your back. In the future a guy who will go by the name of Paul, will have a much better public relations gimmick. It will look, for all the world, that he is really the top dog. Now, let’s getting this meeting started. I want to start with some out of the box brainstorming. Who will go first?”

Bartholomew speaks up. “Well, boss, I think we need something big and flashy, jarring even, to indicate we’re not dead although you are. We all know that the Feast of Weeks is coming up in fewer than fifty days. The town will be filled with celebrants. What if we had a laser light show which looked like tongues of fire, an HD surround sound of a rushing wind, and we all go running into the streets speaking in different languages. Using Rosetta Stone courses we each could learn another language in a couple of days.”

Thomas interjects, “If I didn't believe the boss was resurrected how are others to believe it, even with such a big PR event as Bart suggests?”

Another asks, “Say we pull off this big event, which will blow our bank account, then what? We’re still a small band. Jesus, you were our front guy. It is like the Rolling Stones would not be able to survive without Jagger. I’m not particularly interested in joining a tribute act in the future.”

The boss speaks. “Guys, guys, listen! What if I were to tell you that centuries from now motley lots like you will still be around? They will gather in the far reaches of the earth, places you could never imagine. Our work will carry forward. There will be peaks and valleys along the way. Some gatherings will be very large and others quite small. Taken together they will be called, the Church. I will forever be both the corporate head and CEO. Through you and after you, our work will continue in such huge ways that if I told you about them your minds would explode. Now, get out there and get to work. Oh, Bart, that was an interesting idea. Let’s see what we can do.”

Transitions: Riding the Mouse

As a kid I remember riding a small roller coaster called “The Mouse.” The primary characteristic of it was the abrupt change of direction it frequently took without warning. Were it not for the seat belts and grab handles one could have been easily thrown out of the car. Today, I find it surprising we all did not suffer immediate spinal dislocations. There were a few small hills and drops, but the sudden left and right turns were the “attraction” of the ride. There were no smooth transitions.

We all deal with transitions throughout our life time. Some of the transitions are imperceptible. Six months ago my oldest grandson was a shade over five feet four inches. Last week he measured in a five feet six inches and wears a larger shoe than I do. How and when did that happen? On the other hand, he’ll be facing a big transition in September ow Hhhhwhen he begins high school. For him that might be a jarring transition.

Over the years I have identified three major times of transition for ministers/pastors. This identification has come from observing other ministers and from reflection on my own journey as a teaching elder. Two of the transitions, even with the best planning, seem to be more jarring than the third in which we just kind of find our-self there.

The first transition is from seminary to parish. This is an especially jarring transition for those who lived the previous twenty years in academia. From kindergarten through seminary is a long journey under the tutelage of others and in the acquisition of information. Even if one grew up and remained active in the church all those years, we have to admit, upon ordination, we knew very little about how to be the pastor/teaching elder in and for a congregation. I admit I did not even though I had an excellent education and varied field experience both in college and seminary. Becoming a pastor/teaching elder is one of those abrupt turns which can cause spiritual and emotional whiplash.

The second transition is one which creeps up on the minister. Finding one’s self in “mid-career” is a transition about which very little is written or even talked about. Columbia Seminary is offering a COLLOQUY FOR MID-CAREER CLERGY in May of 2015. They state, Clergy in mid-career face challenges, both personal and professional, that are unique to their stage in life and vocational trajectory. They have accumulated experience, know-how, and a certain amount of confidence. Not quite novices, many are still not “experts.” In fact, one of the paradoxes of clergy in mid-career is serving in increasingly complex contexts that continue to challenge their competencies. (http://www.ctsnet.edu/colloquy-for-mid-career-clergy) Many of us awoke one day and said, “This is a far different church then I signed up for when I was ordained. Do I really want to keep doing this for the next fifteen or twenty years?”

The third transition, and another abrupt one, is into retirement. The Board of Pensions of the PC(U.S.A.) offers an excellent pre-retirement workshop. http://www.pensions.org/MembersAndEmployers/LifeEvents/Pages/Preparing-for-Retirement.aspx) However, one should attend this workshop far, far in advance of actually thinking about retirement. I would advise that one should attend the workshop within the first five years after ordination and then again ten years prior to retirement. Many teaching elders find it nearly impossible to go from one week providing the full range of pastoral services to an “all stop” the next week. The impact of the retirement transition really hits in two or three months, when we realize we are not on an extended vacation. One can only play so much golf before asking, “Is this all there is?”

One need not deal with these transitions in a vacuum. These three transitional times are excellent occasions to engage a coach. A coach will work with you to move into and through these transitions seeking the path for excellence in life and ministry. The world outside of the church has discovered the value of coaching. The church is just beginning to discover the value of coaching. There is no reason for every transition to be like riding “The Mouse,” being abruptly jerked one way and then another.

Meshing or Grinding Gears

How do we envision our ministry? Do we see our self as the only gear or one of several gears needed to move the congregation forward in faith-fulness? What is the ratio of teeth/cogs of our gear and does that ratio align with other gears/ leaders in the congregation?

What is the purpose of a gear? Gears are used for transmitting power from one part of a machine to another. In a bicycle, for example, it's gears (with the help of a chain) that take power from the pedals to the back wheel. Similarly, in a car, gears transmit power from the crankshaft (the rotating axle that takes power from the engine) to the driveshaft running under the car that ultimately powers the wheels. (http://www.explainthatstuff.com/gears.html)

I do not want to push the analogy too far, but the questions are worth pondering. I do not know all that much about gears. I did some internet research and found mind numbing formulas for calculating gear ratios. I am glad the many visible and invisible gears in the numerous machines in my life work, and I do not have to worry about figuring the number of teeth/cogs for each gear and the directional movement of each gear to transfer power into proper operation.

It would be nice if we had formulas for calculating the proper intertwining of the gears for proper operation of the congregation. One thing is certain, if we as pastors do not mesh well with others in the congregation the gear box can explode and do damage to us and to the congregation. However, the gears will not always be syncromeshed, allowing for a smooth shifting and transfer of power.

I grew up driving a three speed manual transmission car. There were times, especially when I was learning to drive that I would “grind the gears.” The application of the clutch and moving the shift lever were not always smoothly done. Everybody around could hear that grinding as the teeth of the gears were not properly interlocking. With years of driving an automatic transmission vehicle, I wager that moving back to a manual transmission would yield more grinding of gears until I relearned the coordination of the clutch and the shift lever.

How efficiently do we and others in the congregation mesh our gears to move the church forward? When we are new to ministry, to meshing with other leaders in the congregation there is always some “grinding of the gears.” After a while, we learn a smoother way of operation. Yet, periodically, we do not mesh and the grinding can be hear by all those around us. When that happens do we keep trying to force things? One of the things which can happen when we continue to force things is one gear or another may break off a tooth and future smooth forward motion is impossible and the congregation sputs and sputters along, of simply stops any forward movement.

If there is a constant or frequent grinding of gears it might signal we need to shift into neutral to reassess why the gears are not smoothly meshing. At these time, a coach can be of significant value. Clutching and shifting is an art which is learned through practice and reflection. Very few people sit behind the wheel of a manual transmission vehicle and innately make smooth shifts necessary to move the vehicle forward at the desired speed and efficiency. The same is true when assuming the positions of preacher or session moderator. There are no mathematical formulas to be applied in every situation. Serving as a pastor is an art which is learned. Coaching enables a greater syncromeshing of pastor and other leaders in the congregation.

Coaching is an Investment in Ministers

In season 4 episode 5 of The Voice, the musical artist Usher stated, “Being a coach on The Voice is to make an investment in people.”¹ Coaching is a self-investment by the minister and an investment by the coach in the minister. When congregations and presbyteries encourage pastors to have a coach -- and help fund the coaching costs -- they are making an investment in the minister. Through this multilevel investment, coaching has the potential for lengthening pastoral tenure and stemming the attrition rate of those in the early years of pastoral ministry.

Every minister can benefit by having a ministry coach, especially those in their early years of serving a congregation. It does not matter whether one has taken the path from high school to college to seminary to first call, or is a second career pastor. Serving a congregation is different than anything done before. Pastoral ministry is an art learned best through intentional reflection on one’s ministry.

Coaching begins with the conviction that the minister is whole, resourceful and creative. Coaching draws upon the minister's gifts, skills, knowledge, insights and wisdom to establish future oriented goals addressing personal and ministry oriented issues, and developing concrete steps to realize the fulfillment of the goals. Coaching focuses on the minister not the ministry context. The coach maintains a strict standard of confidentiality. Unless it is part of the coaching contract, the coach does not report to the session or to the presbytery about the person being coached or the coaching content.

No pastor goes into their first, or any successive, call expecting it to be short-term. Coaching helps the pastor avoid the short-term call syndrome by:

Ø  Providing a safe arena for intentional reflection on the practice of ministry

Ø  Clarifying one’s role as a pastor

Ø  Dealing with multiple expectations from congregation members

Ø  Sorting the important from the urgent

Ø  Gaining perspective and avoiding blind spots in ministry

Ø  Dealing constructively with conflict

Ø  Handling frustration, failure and anger

Ø  Being a less anxious presence in a highly anxious situation

A Google search for “why pastors quit” reveals a multitude of articles listing reasons for and statistics on the startling attrition of ministers across the theological spectrum.

A frightening number of ministers face dissolution of their call within the first five years. An alarming number of ministers become disillusioned and leave ministry in the first five years. Duke University, Alban Institute and Fuller Seminary have produced studies which indicate a dropout rate of ministers in the first five years ranging from fifty percent to eighty-five percent.² In today’s church environment very few will remain in ministry from ordination to retirement.

Secular employers know it is less expensive to retain an employee than constantly training new employees. On the Presbyterian Mission Agency website, it states, It costs your Presbyterian seminaries an average $109,000 to educate a Master of Divinity student for three years.³

That is a significant investment by the individual and by seminary benefactors. Short term pastorates are harmful to congregations,⁴ and disheartening to ministers.

In 2004, the Board of Pensions produced a report on clergy recruitment and retention.⁵ In 2006, the Board produced another study on mid-career ministers. Both studies raised the concern of attrition in the first years of pastoral service.

The 2004 report identified three primary contributors to the attrition: stress, conflict, and burnout. Ministers, whether new to ministry or with several years of experience, are hesitant to go to colleagues or mid-council staff with their frustrations or unfulfilled dreams. Nobody likes to admit they are having difficulties or are deeply discouraged in their present call.  Due to the referencing function of presbytery executive staff and the stigma of contacting those who fill the role of the Committee on Ministry, ministers are reluctant to seek help from them. It is unwise for ministers to bare the burdens of one’s soul to congregants. The minister is left with few options other than to internalize. Internalized difficulties and unfulfilled dreams are the seedbeds for weed like growth of the contributors to attrition. A coach helps the minister and increases the potential for lengthening pastoral tenure and lessening pastoral attrition.

Coaching and having a coach is an investment worth making in the minister and the congregation(s) they serve.

1.      Zayda Rivera, April 9, 2013 http://www.nydailynews.com/blogs/channel-surfer/2013/04/the-voice-season-4-episode-5-recap-usher-shakira-starting-to-hold-own-as-new-

2.      Keeping Your Pastor: An Emerging Challenge, Kristin Stewart, Oakland City University 2009. http://www.oak.edu/~oakedu/assets/ck/files/Stewart+(SU+09).pdf

3.      Short-term Pastorates, Arnold Kurtz, January, 1980. https://www.ministrymagazine.org/archive/1980/01/short-term-pastorates

4.      http://www.presbyterianmission.org/ministries/seminaries/students/

5.      Report on Clergy Recruitment and Retention (2004)

http://www.pensions.org/AvailableResources/BookletsandPublications/Documents/pub-500.pd

6.      Supporting Mid-Career Pastors of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.) (2006) http://www.pensions.org/AvailableResources/BookletsandPublications/Documents/pub-501.pdf‎